Not in Kansas No More
by p7ro
Summary: Stiles and Derek, after a weird mishap with some Faeries end up back in time and have quite a bit of revelations. Sterekish, note characters


"OW! Watch it!" "Stiles shut up and stop squirming" "Then move your bony ass" "Move your leg!"

Stiles hardly knew how he had gotten there. It was always a cliché thing to think but honestly by now he was just too panicked to care how it sounded. Being stuck in a children's park in the middle of the night in a fucking vine net after witnessing another case of good old Beacon Hill

Violence of the Week tended to wind up Stiles' nerves.

Of course, this being his life, he was stuck there with Derek, as though he needed more irony in his life. As though the awkward situation-that-shall-not-be-named-or-discussed-ever-again-this-life-time in the kitchen last week hadn't been enough. As though Stiles hasn't been avoiding the Alpha for the past week in hopes of the ground opening up and swallowing him whole.

"Stiles! Stop thinking so much and help me find a way out" Derek snapped at him while struggling against their confinements. Stiles huffed and rolled his eyes, pushing ineffectively at the vines around them.

"Oh of course" He snarked back at the werewolf, "Because it's my damned fault we got trapped by a fucking faerie! Like what the fuck since when are their faeries! They can't even be decent Disney faeries no they had to be blue skinned devil demons from hell and all that glory out for a horrible revenge and nothing of the cuteness or hotness of Pan's little sidekick which now that I think about it doesn't surprise me seeing as she wanted Wendy killed at first and -"

Derek jabbed him in the side. Hard. "Shit!"

"Shut up and help me" Derek growled when Stiles stabbed a finger between his ribs in retaliation, hurting himself more than the werewolf. It must have been too much for the vines for suddenly Derek and Stiles found themselves in a heap under the tree they had been hanging from.

"Glad that's over with, you stink of blood and faerie goo and glitter and I don't want any part of that as everyone knows that glitter is the herpes of the world-" Stiles rambled to try and distract Derek from the reactions his body had with the close approximation of their bodies and flails to get in an upright standing position. Derek seemed to not notice, standing up and growling at Stiles.

Suddenly Derek was lifting his head and scenting the air. Stiles was still rambling about how herpes and glitter were horrible and how it probably affected all the high school posters and atmosphere of the world when Derek held up a hand for silence.

"Something is off… wrong…" He says quietly, still scenting the air. Stiles froze on the spot and stopped his rambling. His mind was racing 'don't let it be me don't let it be me' he desperately chanted in his mind.

"Like… old moldy cheese wrong or something waiting to ripe out our intestines and eat them wrong?" Stiles ventured nervously running his hand through his hair. "Either one sucks but moldy cheese is preferred over gut eating. I'm sure I wouldn't even taste dece – hey where are you going?! Derek!" Stiles yelped when Derek was suddenly striding off quickly, short of running.

Stiles tried to keep up with minimal damage to his limbs and his face, barely keeping Derek in sight. Luckily Derek wasn't wolfing out and Stiles supposed that if the 'wrong' was something out to eat him Derek wouldn't leave him behind and unguarded. Or, Stiles supposed he wouldn't or at least he would feel challenged enough to take it on and provide running away time for Stiles or something of the sort. He hoped that was the case because he didn't want to die a virgin and damn it was on his to-do list he just had problems finding candidates for the job and three messy middle school kisses and a drunk fumble did not count okay!

Stiles was still panicking in his head when he noticed Derek had stopped ahead. Stiles approached slowly and what was in his mind subtly, then gasped when he was standing beside the werewolf, who was frozen to the spot.

"Fuck." Stiles breathes out, "Toto, I don't think we are in Kansas anymore…"


End file.
